Psychology is a vast and devious thing. Mind control is an art; applied on yourself or on others.
It would be so much fun if we could have people following the same things as we do, or agreeing to whatever we propose; it would be so good if people would actually do what we want them to do sometimes, with or without knowing.
If that can happen, it will be solving so much problems and arguments in our politics; also the Government will be spared of all those dog fights in the Houses while passing a Bill.
Let’s just imagine that our parents gladly agree to our college trips without us having to convince them much, or may be shopping becomes a dream come true every weekend, wouldn’t that be wonderful!
It is not so difficult to get things done; a few tricks can actually help; you just need to know the right thing to be input at the right time.
Let’s look at a few tips:
- Nodding your head while asking a question will make the other person more inclined to agree with you.
- If you want to get rid of an object that you are carrying while going with someone, you can keep talking with the other person, while handing over the object to him/her. He or she will most often take it without a question. (The other person’s brain will be engrossed in the subject of the conversation, and the object won’t generally distract him or her; remember, brain can receive only a few information at a time.)
- If you feel irritated that someone is looking at you, pretend to look at your watch; if the other person is actually looking at you, he/she will definitely look at his/her watch to find out what you are paying attention to.
- If someone wants to get to have others attending him/her, or sympathizing with him/her all the time, he/she mostly presents self as a ‘poor fellow’. Such people are often found saying “why this always happens to me,” “I am a doomed person,” etc. so that you feel that their misfortune is graver than yours and you try to attend them even if with a negative attitude.
- Reasoning persuades reasonable people. If you want to get your Xerox done first, rather than saying, “I have only 2 copies”, say that “I want to use the machine first because I am in tremendous hurry”. An experiment found that 90% of the people will let you proceed in first, in a queue if you use ‘because’, i.e. you are giving a proper reason for your cause. (Though I have no idea whether it works in our Indian culture. :))
If you are aware of these transactional patterns, you can actually use them in your favour. Once you have an idea of how the other person will react in a situation, you can actually prevent many quarrels and arguments for the good; make others agree with you and bear a coherent relationship with everyone around you, which can actually help you progress in life.