• 02 Jan
    Neelima Krishnakumar

    The ultimate aim of cognitive behavioural therapy

    cognitive behavioural therapy


    CBT can breakdown the sense of overwhelming problems by fragmenting them into parts. In CBT, problems are disintegrated to mainly 5 functional areas like

    • Situations
    • Thoughts
    • Emotions
    • Physical feelings
    • Actions

     cognitive therapy

    According to CBT, these 5 functional areas are interconnected and affect each other. Situations lead to thoughts and feelings which further percolates into emotions and actions.

    CBT differs from other psychotherapy concepts by solving the problem amicably and by stopping negative thought cycles. Suppose you lose the job because of recession or some other unforeseen reason, you can be pensive, brood over it and remain inactive.

    But you can be actually socially more active by interacting among your friends circle, which can fetch sometimes a better job. This will further boost up your social standing.

    CBT teaches you to avoid negative life cycles and to remain always positively charged. CBT controls the negative life cycles by breaking them to components so that identification of a rational solution is easier.

    By making your problems more manageable, CBT thus can help you change your negative thought patterns and improve the way you feel.

    More important is that since CBT is a self helping process, you can achieve this on your own over a period of time and tackle your problems without even the help of a therapist. This is the ultimate aim of cognitive behavioural therapy.


    CBT sessions

    CBT can be carried out with a therapist in one to one sessions or in groups with other people facing similar problems as you.

    These sessions can be carried out

    • In the clinic of the therapist
    • Outside in a congenial environment
    • It can be conducted even at your home especially if you have agoraphobia
    • Virtual sessions (Skype sessions / telephonic sessions) with the therapist without leaving the convenience of your home


    A CBT session can last for 30 minutes to 1 hour and if you are taking CBT on an individual basis, you will have to meet the therapist for 5 to 20 weekly or fortnightly sessions, as the situation is assessed by the therapist.

    CBT is usually conducted by a specialist trained in CBT such as a psychiatrist, psychologist, mental health nurse or even a general practitioner.


    First sessions

    These are aimed at assessing whether CBT is the right therapy for you and whether you are comfortable with the process. The therapist will estimate the percentage of interferences your condition has contributed to your family, work and social life.


    Further sessions

    Then the therapist will help you segregate your problem into the essential components as already suggested. The therapist may ask you to keep a diary and write down your thoughts and behaviour patterns.

    The next process is to analyse these thoughts, feelings and behaviours to segregate unrealistic, fanciful and unhelpful ones from positive ones. After working out what you can change, your therapist will suggest to practice these changes in your daily life.


    Example for an unhelpful thought process and how it affects you is given below

    Situation: You saw one of your friends walking by the road and he ignored you.

    Unhelpful Thoughts: He ignored me which means that he hates me.

    Emotions: Sad, anger

    Physical feelings: Very low energy, feeling sick

    Action: Ignore/avoid that friend going forward


    Now let’s look at the same situation by switching to helpful thought process and see how the outcome varies as a result

    Situation: You saw one of your friends walking by the road and he ignored you.

    Helpful Thoughts: He didn’t notice me! He looks very worried too. May be he is a little preoccupied with something.

    Emotions: Positive

    Physical feelings: Usual

    Action: Call up your friend and check if he is ok

    The situation in both the examples remained the same but it led to two different outcomes based on the thought process which was used. This clearly shows that your thought process affects your feelings and actions.

    One of the biggest benefits of CBT is that once the therapy is finished, you can apply these principles in your daily life as well. A number of interactive software programmes are now available that allow you to benefit from CBT with

    How can you get CBT?

    • You can go to a trained CBT therapist for a face to face session
    • You can use online counselling sites like eWellness expert for a virtual session (i.e. via Skype/phone)
    • You can try self help CBT books / apps

    Image source 1 2

  • 14 Dec
    eWellness Expert

    12 keys to an extraordinary life of fulfillment

    man running


    Unlock your true potential through the power of parallel. While exclusive focus on outward achievement or fulfillment will bring results- combine these forces through the six primary categories of your life to create the truly extraordinary.


     Your Keys to an Extraordinary Life of Fulfillment from Tony Robbins



    Key 1 Balance Your Body

    Power up the right way of eating more leafy green vegetables and cutting down on sugar to alkalize your body-

    75% of your diet should be composed of alkaline foods


    Key 2 Help Others

    Giving activates regions of the brain associated with pleasure, social connection and trust – and also releases endorphins resulting in a positive feeling known as the helper’s high.



    Key 3 Master your time

    Feed your mind and put you N.E.T. time (No extra time) to use.

    While you commute, run errands, exercise or clean the house, listen to podcasts or other short burst resources that will help you achieve your dreams.


    Key 4 Always know your purpose

    Challenges will always arise, even with the best time management system in place. Since 20% of what you do in life usually makes 80% of the difference, the ”why” is the most important thing to know. If you have a great enough “why”, you will ignite the emotional fuel achieve the “how”



    Key 5 Build a money machine

    The power of compounding can build your nest egg – but associated fees can rob you of what you’ve earned! A simple 1% in fees can cost you over 10 years of comfortable retirement funds.


    Key 6 Discover true wealth

    Money doesn’t buy happiness

    Become financially free by saving more and building you money machine, but allow  yourself to spend wisely. Create “magic moments” and incredible memories you can share for a lifetime with loved ones.



    Key 7 Optimize and maximize

    Sometimes, the greatest growth opportunities don’t come from new initiatives, but executing existing processes more effectively. Small, incremental improvements in a few key areas, multiplied over time= geometric growth to the whole business


    Key 8 Align with your true nature

    Discover and cultivate your core leadership gifts to learn how to live to the fullest with what you do best. By not only cultivating your own abilities, but having compassion and appreciation of others’ gifts, you can create a synergy that allows you to work effectively toward a common vision.


    Mind & spirit

    Key 9 Adopt empowering beliefs

    Free yourself from the beliefs that limit positive action and prevent you from reaching your potential.

    Our beliefs come from 5 places: our environment or circumstances, powerful life events, our knowledge, past results and future vision.

    Do your beliefs limit you or empower you?


    Key 10 Live in the present and create a beautiful state

    By exploring and identifying which emotions uniquely infuse your mind and spirit with the most joy, you can learn to cultivate their power to create a more fulfilling state of being.



    Key 11 Keep the passion alive

    Create, experience and – most vitally – maintain the lasting passion you desire.

    By identifying and understanding what worked best in the beginning of your relationship, you can continue to meet the needs of your lover and enrich your mutual experience.


    Key 12 Put your partner first

    The ultimate key to creating and experiencing an extraordinary, fulfilling relationship is to first work on yourself.

    When you raise your standards for your own behavior and actions, you will naturally empower and engage with the best in your partner.



  • 12 Dec
    eWellness Expert

    How would it be if there were no stigma attached to psychological problems

    no stigma for mental health

    Openeness about psychological problem

      no stigma to mental health

    who depression lets talk


    Depressed person would share their feelings openly

    no stigma mental health

    traumatic event


    PTSD people would be treated routinely 

    traumatic event

    drug addiction counselling


    Addicted People would be treated with love

    addiction no stigma

    post partum depression


    Pregnant women would not suffer silently  

    no stigma post partum depression

    learning disability


    Emotional support for Children with learning disabilities

    learning disability


    Jeffrey Lieberman has explained more about this in his Ted Talk


  • 07 Dec
    eWellness Expert

    How to lead extrovert?

    introvert extrovert

    Extroverts can be the most valuable companions. Their urge to talk with several people, and their ability to deal with complete strangers in the friendliest manner can be beneficial to you too.

    Being with extroverts, or having a friend of the kind can ensure that you will be spared from the painful task of talking to people, or approaching someone. An extrovert friend with you, can do the job of enquiring the road directions which you might be hesitant on.

    They can even talk and make friends with the coldest of sales persons and senior designated managers.

    But they do not come to your doors with only gifts, they appear with their own backlogs or shortcomings.

    More often, their energy is not properly channelized, they are too much enthusiastic about several things. And they do not focus, they tend to be thinking and doing several things at a time, which can lead to confusion and mismanagement.


    How will you guide an extrovert person as a leader?

    It is important to know how to speak to them- Speak to an extrovert in their native language, that will help them engage with you better and faster.

    They will bring up multiple ideas in their conversation with you, if you are talking in their tongue. However, if you are using an official language or business colloquialism, and they are not comfortable, they will be easily disgusted with your conduct.

    If you are an introvert, and you have to talk to an extrovert, try to be listener with interesting expressions J which means they will know you are listening very carefully.

    They love movies with large casts and to make their love turn into your benefit, try memorizing a few speech phrases or movie names or subjects which are tacky and will attract them immediately. You start up the topic and they will continue it endlessly.


    Encourage their enthusiasm- A leader should know, how to manage an extrovert. Naturally, they are power houses, and if you feel they are talking unnecessarily on an issue, which requires no discussion, don’t vent it on them.

    Encourage the enthusiasm of your extrovert employee. Let his share his idea. Appreciate it if it is good, even though it may not be relevant to the situation.

    You do not have to share your expert advice all the time,” kind of conduct can automatically demoralize them, and that will hamper their future performance when the spirit is required.


    To get a thing done, white lie to them, that it is for a person- we may perceive the world in terms of relationship of ideas, knowledge, art, commitment etc. but extroverts identify the same in terms of relationships between people.

    It is hard for them to believe that a person can choose to stay alone or work alone, or may have something called privacy, but they will easily believe and understand that there is another person whose happiness depends on you.

    So to make them adhere to a deadline or commitment, tell them that ‘the job needs to be done for an important person’. You need not let him know that the important person is you; you are indeed important.


    Let them multitask- Extroverts get easily bored if they are left with one particular kind of work for a long time. Give them three to four jobs or tasks together. Have the trust that they will utilize their time in their own way for each one of them and will be productive enough.


    Extroverts need to speak to think- even if you are bored or tired of their never ending discussions, you have to let them speak and engage with them to discern the idea that they are trying to bring out.

    May be they are trying to talk about a single idea which is important, but they can speak a lot of other things for proving the point. You need to bear it.


    Let them work independently- let them just dive into a concept on their own, if you want them to work on something properly. Tell them the topic, and instead of going into further explanations or your guidelines, let them think and decide for themselves.

    Extroverts love to work independently, and flaunt their variegated ideas. When they hear of something new, they want to jump into it immediately. Do not withhold their free spirit.

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