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My friend is in depression. I really want to help her, what should I do?

22 Jun
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User's Question

My friend is recently out of a break up. She is depressed; frustrated; sometimes she hates herself, she thinks it was all her fault. She blames herself becaause she has been a fool. Actually we as girls are socially conditioned to blame ourselves for whatever happens; especially the stigma never leaves us. When a girl is out of a relationship, she feels rejected, humiliated, insulted and used and my friend is exactly feeling the same. The whole day she scorns the guy, abuses him and I have no problem with that, but she in the process, never forgets him; sometimes, she gets too emotional, breaks down and cries; tries to call him up, but I know it is of no use. I have tried to explain that life is too long to waste on this episode, but she hardly listens and I feel she is gradually getting engrossed in the depressive state; I fear, she doesn't attempt any wrong move like suicide or so. Please tell me how can I rationally make her understand?

22 Jun
Dr. Ibrahim Abunada

Doctors Answer

Jun 22, 2016 11:20 AM

Dear helper, Let me first of all thank you and encourage you for this sincere feeling toward your friend which consider passing a very critical time for her. For your knowledge Depression is a mental disorder that affects more than 350 million people across the globe. According to the World health organization (WHO), it’s the leading cause of disability, a major contributor to global disease, and it leads to suicide and some people may be prone to it more than others. Depression causes severe symptoms that affect how you feel, think, and handle daily activities, such as sleeping, eating, or working. To be diagnosed with depression, the symptoms must be present for at least two weeks. Depression can happen at any age from infancy, early childhood, adult, middle age and elderly age, but in every age group there are some signs and symptoms slightly differ from other age group. This fact can be determined by many factors, e.g. one’s lifestyle, educational level, previous life experiences, social support, family support, peer support, the onset and the suddenness of the event. Anyway, it is very crucial to look for psychological consultation such as supportive Psychotherapy. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which in generally considered as the most effective form of treatment for depression and anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy focuses on the thinking patterns and behaviors that are sustaining the depression. I strongly encourage you to stay near your friend helping her through these steps. For instance, you should focus on her negative attitudes and thoughts about herself and her circumstances. Try your best help her to see the world through colored glasses not only through black glasses. Try to guide her to  add some positive changes to her daily life routine such as look for new relationships with people, colleagues, and friends. Try to help her to use her strong points and positive aspects of her personality, abilities to achieve some of her life goals such as finding a suitable job, house, etc. Talk with some trustworthy people to help her choose convenient goals. In addition to all above suggestions she should consult an online specialist. Take Care