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Low self esteem with anxiety & depression

28 Sep
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User's Question

I feel lost, unmotivated,living for the day. My dreams are dying. I don't have a perfect friend. I don't feel myself.  I have a few hobbies. I am learning to play keyboard. I do pencil sketches. But I have lost passion. I am a short guy with spectacles,but above average looking. I used to be a nerd. I have turned into an atheist. It has really helped me in my depression. I like science but it doesn't like me back. I had nice curly hair, like jon snow of you will. But recently I am suffering from heavy hairfall. I come from the village. My father was a control freak,drunkard, & little abusive. He's lost all his money,self respect & health. Whatever he's done in life has been counter productive to our life. Bu our means me, my twin brother & my mother. One of the biggest psychological problems i have been facing all my life is I can not talk with girls & women, especially of they are cute & attractive. It has instilled in me some sort of diffidence. It puts a lot of social,psychological,sexual pressure on me. Because of this disability, I have done things like trying to fullfil the lack of woman in my life by going to massage centres & feeling their touch. I am afraid of myself that i might go further of i don't succeed in having a proper relationship with girls. Needless to say. I never had a girlfriend, nor do i have. My situation is so pathetic that i don't even have a single female friend, despite me being a gentleman. I don't know what to do with my life currently. My attempts at exams have failed. I was above average till my engineering was completed. I got placed in the best company that came to our college for placements. I used to be a nerd, my friends called me scientist. But after that, since last two years, i have degraded, mentally, physically, in technical knowledge, family & social life. I need to find myself again. I don't want to be afraid of anything. I want a healthy relationship with girls, women & everyone. There's much much more, i can talk a lot about it, probably not here Yours faithfully,
29 Sep
Dr. Ibrahim Abunada

Doctors Answer

Sep 29, 2016 12:50 PM

Dear User, it seems that you have a very pathetic life condition. I do believe that you have the desire and motivations to improve your life conditions and to proceed forward in your daily life. I strongly encourage you to continue struggling to reach your full capacity by all means. In the light of that I want to provide you with some steps you can try to overcome your life a burden. Try to stay strong don’t surrender to your circumstances, mainly, familial circumstances. Try your best to use your strong aspects in your personal characteristics. Don’t underestimate your capabilities. Try to share your hopes and dreams with other trustworthy people around you. Share your community with their social activities and events. Try your best to build healthy relationship with some trusted people to share them with your life dreams. If you tried these steps and feel you need further instructions you can consult an online therapist for more clarifications. Take Care.