How to not get angry at my mother

17 Aug
Name Confidential

After I come home from college, my mom starts shouting at me because I just lie down and do nothing. I don't do anything because I am tired and don't have the energy. I have tried telling her this multiple times yet she gets angry at me for this. This makes me frustrated too. So much so that I don't feel like coming home. What can I do do calm myself down?

Responses 5

  • Priya Parwani
    Priya Parwani   Aug 20, 2017 02:45 PM


    Hoe you doing good. I also go through the same things and I think most of does. Parents expect so much from children whether it is related to any household work or work of our own and if we don't fulfill it they yell on us. It's a story of almost every teenager, so you should do the following things to avoid the tustle between you and your mom:

    1) Try to tell her that it's important for you have time for own self [say about 30-40 minutes] because needs time to get rejuvenated and it's important for the well being also.

    2) Try to give the scientific explanation behind the importance of rest.

    3) Try to complete the things of your mom either early in the morning or soon after you get rejuvenated.

    4) Try to complete the important task first and then spend some time on recreational activities.

    5) If she still doesn't agrees with you then you should not take her words so seriously because you know your body well and have to take the care of your health.

    Hope this will help. 

  • Ayushi Jolly
    Ayushi Jolly   Aug 20, 2017 02:04 AM

    Hey there! I hope you are doing well.

    We all have lifestyles where we tend to become so busy so that we do not have time or energy for anything.One main reason here can be the generation gap and the lifestyle disparity. What really goes wrong is the fact that when our parents studied,they did not have sp uch pressure on them.They,though did house work but did not have so much social pressure and that hinders them from understanding our point of view.They think that if we are socializing or being busy with our lifestyle,then we are not doing anything productive but instead are wasting our time only.However,little can be done to suddenly change this midnset.However there are certain things which you can adapt to,so that things get better at your end.

    1.Try prioritizing things and the family also.Give them the time they deserve.

    2.Try to get free of the things that are not meant to be for you. Do not stay uselessly busy.

    3.Sit with your mother and try to explain to her,the story from your point of view.Do not try to impose things on her but just seek help on that you are busy and you want to help but cannot find a way.

    4.Try to understand things from her point of view as well.She might also be just as busy or fed up and wants you to help or support.

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Aug 17, 2017 09:00 PM

    Hope you are doing well. I can clearly understand about your concern.  You can just sit and talk with your mother about your tiredness.  I can hereby suggest you something helpful.

    1. You can convince your mom to take rest for some time. Give her the assurance that you will sleep for 15-30 minutes, then you can do the tasks she have been assigned you.
    2. You can sleep early and wake up early which can really makes you refresh for the whole day. You can so some stretches, physical exercises, yoga and meditations regularly to feel fresh.
    3. Also, you should help your mom in her home works like cleaning home to also make her happy. That is, which will make her to think as her daughter have become adult and know about their duties. So, she may understand about you.
    4. You can just sit and talk with your mom in evening about your tiredness of daily happenings. So, she may understand about your health, and will help you.


    Hope, it helps you!!

    Take Care :)

  • Rasi M Sethia
    Rasi M Sethia   Aug 17, 2017 08:15 PM


    This is the story of most of the college teens. Yes we get tired and our mothers don't understand that most of the time until we are really unwell. But at the same time we fail to understand what are mothers go through the entire day. They do more work than us and are more tired than us and with age they are becoming more weak. They get up in the morning early, prepare the breakfast for the entire family, do our lunvh boxes, maintain the cleanliness of the house, prepare lunch, go out if they have to and come back home and prepare for dinner. We fail to understand that are super moms are not really super womans. By the end of the day, their battery goes down too but still they fulfill all our demands. All she wants is a helping hand and little support. You can take some rest and then help her out. Avoid arguements with her. She goes through a lot of things some which we are not even aware of. She is more stressed and tensed than us. Arguements and being angry would help none. It would affect both of you. Afterall you love her and she does too and both of you matter to each other a lot. 

  • Shreya Narayanan
    Shreya Narayanan   Aug 17, 2017 07:49 PM

    Hello there,

    Trust me,if not you,I would've definitely posted this question. This is exactly what I go through everyday.

    I come home from college,no energy,mom taunts me,angers me but yet,I don't do anything stupid. And why is that I've got two reasons:

    Now,I love my mother. No matter how irritating or annoying I find her at times,I love and respect the sacrifices she has made for me and I admire and duly respect it. That is why,I know that I'll regret if I say or something stupid,I always think about the future possibilities,and that keeps my mouth shut and my body muscles weak.

    Second reason is, I know I'm tired and won't be able to do anything productive for a few hours,I know that because I know my body. Does she know my body? No. She only knows me and my capabilities,but not my body's capacity at that point of time. So don't pay any heed. You know it because you believe in yourself,and you know you're right. So stop paying attention to her if she speaks anything irrelevant and go with your work. It is hard,the latter but you have to because at one point,moms need to realize that we can take our own decisions and sustain in this cruel world by ourselves. 

Book an appointment