Being a girl

23 Aug
Name Confidential

There was a time when girls were only meant to get married and do the household work but at present in most of the families this is not the case. Girls are allowed to study and choose whichever field they want to, they are allowed to work even after marriage. They have been given freedom now but still girls are taught all the household work whereas boys are don't. These days after marriage women work as well as handle the house. She has double responsibilities. Not all men help them with the household work. In the coming years the number of families with this scenario will increase. So why boys aren't taught household work too along with the sisters by their mothers? Wouldn't this be a great help in maintaing family in the future? Why don't people understand this? Shouldn't all irrespective of their sex should know how to work as well as maintain the house? 

Responses 8

  • Aishwarya K
    Aishwarya K   Aug 28, 2017 01:27 AM

    Unfortunately, women face these issues more because this mentality has been ingrained in our society that it’s a woman’s role to take care of the family. The current mentality that runs in our society is that women are responsible for nurturing, cooking, and cleaning. Because of this mentality, it is often assumed that women will take care of their family over taking up a job.

    This leads woman to have inner conflicts. Even though they really want to work and have a job they will often be stuck at home doing chores. It might even be difficult for them to open up about what they really want to do because even they believe that taking care of the house is their primary responsibility when it is not. Men should equally help out at home. In fact, every member of the house including children should perform their own chores.

    Work should be divided equally among all members so that it is fair. When both husband and wife are working, it should not just be the wife’s responsibility to come home and make dinner. The husband and wife should take turns making dinner. Other chores should be divided equally among them so that the working women are not burdened with responsibility. 

  • Priya Parwani
    Priya Parwani   Aug 27, 2017 01:38 PM

    Hello.

    Hope you doing good. I agree with you that men should also know hoe to do household work and should help their wives and sisters to do the same. But sadly all these things don't take place in our society at a larger pace, thanks to our mentality! From the starting boys are raised differently and girls are raised differently, from here only things starts to be difficult for girls. Yes, it's true that women are now flourishing in every domain but the roots of upbringing is still the same. Girls always have the pressure of doing household work no matter how much successful she is, which is very bad. We have made very rigid stereotypes towards women that when someone wants to change it, we are just unable to cope up. 

    The remedy lies in the  upbringing of boys, they should teach to do all the household work and should not consider that work as inferior to other work. Hope one day we will have a society where men and women suppoert each for growth and success in each domain.

  • Ayushi Jolly
    Ayushi Jolly   Aug 25, 2017 05:54 PM

    Hey there! I hope you are doing well. I thank you for raising such a sensible question.

    Things are really still very much out of date when it comes to gender comparison.On one hand,we observe woman empowerment and all the jazz and on the other the reality is so different.Even in educated families,women have failed to achieve their due respect. Their is no single reason to be blamed for here. There are so many things that compile together to form this attitude. There are theories that explain mob mentality and how one has to behave in a particular way to be ingrouped. I believe,so many people want to stand against such discrimination but are unable to because of the fear of being outgrouped. 

    Coming to maintainign families and doing housework will not bring a man down on his ego scale or a women climb higher but will help them in labelling themseleves as better humans who help each other in times of need. Women receive education so that their children can get good education and that they can work well and also be taken to social gatherings.Women are still not appreciated when they want to work. I believe,the old school menatlity prevails and also that men are scary that if women take a stand,they will be left behind.

  • Minaish Dhabhar
    Minaish Dhabhar   Aug 25, 2017 11:58 AM

    Hi there,

    I know what you mean and I do understand, it is frustrating. I do have to add though that I see a lot of households where men do some of the work and I've noticed, not surprisingly, that these are the households where parents have raised their children to all indulge in chores and household work, regardless of their sex. This builds discipline and character in children as well as helps them learn that these activities must be completed, without any compromise on gender. 

    I think education lies in the hands of the parents, but as a woman, a woman should be bold enough to realise that this is not her duty singlehandedly and ask her partner to help as well. Similarly, as a man, one must realise that he is equally responsible in taking care of the household.

    These things will slowly change. I live in an urban setting so I am aware that the situation here is better and more progressive than it is in some other parts of the country, but I think we as individuals have to encourage equality in all ways, and slowly this will get ingrained in society and thus in our households.

     

  • Shreya Narayanan
    Shreya Narayanan   Aug 24, 2017 01:23 PM

    Hello there,

    Yes,I totally am for this motion,but I feel it all comes to a personal choice,even of a girl. If she doesn't want to learn cooking and cleaning the house,it's okay. A woman is definitely not restricted to a kitchen,she is a modern 21st century woman and can do wonders,just as men have been doing since ages,only the difference being,women are getting recognised now.

    Definitely,I think if a woman is working and taking care of the house,the man needs to help her in the chores, basically share the household chores. I've always believed in the yin and yang power. The power of balance,between the masculine and the feminine. Without one,the other is useless.

    Hence,I totally feel this initiative of teaching men how to respect women needs to be imbibed in young boys,so that they too can be feminists and help women achieve their goal.

    Hope this helps. Thank you.

  • Shubhanshi Singh
    Shubhanshi Singh   Aug 24, 2017 08:34 AM

    Hey there! 

    Your question is completely valid. Being a girl, being a woman, I have seen so many other females getting buried under family and office work. They don't have work life balance. They are grinding themselves to make everyone happy yet they are not given the equal respect and importance. Their work in not appreciated and isn't valued. This is not fair. 

    Why aren't males taught to help females with the household work? Because there manliness will be challanged? Is that how insecure males are of their manliness? 

    I think this change must come from within. Only if a person realises that it's not only a females work to take care of the family, they will be able to truly help them. It's very important to inculcate this view from the beginning, from childhood. Children must be taught to help their mothers with small chores. Children learn by modelling others. If they see their fathers helping their mother, they will also learn to do the same when they grow up. 

  • Sanjna Verma
    Sanjna Verma   Aug 23, 2017 10:57 PM

    Hello there. Yes, you are very right towards bringing up the fact that even men in the household should contribute towards household work.

    But unfortunately this practice is hardly adopted in Indian society. All thanks to gender stereotyping wherein men are considered to be the breadwinner and women as the homemaker. Unfortunately, there are still many families which do not allow women to go for work.

    Unless and until this midest changes in the families, even women will feel less burdened, especially in the current times when women are managing the house and their job. 

    I agree with the fact that males of the household are not taught household work. Because 'such things are not meant for men.' But gradually things are changing. I have seen in my family. My father used to stay away from us for 2 years due to which he tries to inculcate this habit of doing household work as everyone needs to know how to go about it.

    Such stereotypical changes definitely require time, even a generation as well. It is important to getting aware at the larger scale.

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Aug 23, 2017 10:07 PM

    Hi!!!

       Hope you are doing well. I can clearly understand about your concern.  And I truly agree with your statement. But a boy who has sister will know about the girls responsibilities and their plight situations. So, they can really help a girl in his future life too. And also every mom should teach about these if a boy doesn’t have any sisters. Every boys should be taught in school and colleges about the weakness of a girl/women. As everyone should create the awareness about the equality of everyone in this  world. Everyone is human and a girl is not a being who can able to hold all the responsibility by her.

    A boy who can help her girl in all ways is the best couple who cares for both. Boys who take their education and responsibilities seriously are so much more attractive then boys just don’t care. So, creating awareness through their education else by their mom. It’s the only way to make a boy to recognize about his responsibilities.

    Hope it helps you!!!

    Take Care :)

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