Socially Conscious (Especially When It Comes to Boys)

28 Aug
Name Confidential

hi everyone,

I am not sure if I have worded the question correctly but basically, I used to have pretty low self-esteem as a younger teenager (most kids at that age do) and would care a lot about what other people think of me. My self-confidence has increased now and I don't care half as much about what other people think, however I have noticed when it comes to people I'm attracted to or have crushes on, I tend to be more judgemental and have higher standards. Even with tiny flaws that other people may notice, or if other people dislike them, this affects my feelings towards the person and I really don't want it to be this way but it's almost automatic. What can I do?

Responses 3

  • Priya Parwani
    Priya Parwani   Sep 03, 2017 01:12 AM


    Hope you doing well. Ican completely understand your situation. Its normal to get conscious when it comes to our crushes or boyfriend. We want to look our best in front of them and for tha even a small things creates a matter of big concern. But I will suggest you just one thing and that is Be Yourself. There is no point of changing and disliking yourself because others consider yourself as flawed. We all have flaws and we should accept them, we should accept ourselves and love ourselves. When we love ourselves only then others can too. So be confident and talk to your crush and don't be conscious about your looks because what matters is your inner self and personality. If that boy is right for you, he will automatically be attracted towards you not because of looks but because of your good personality.

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Aug 29, 2017 07:18 PM


       Hope you are doing well. I can clearly understand about your concern.  And I suggest you not to be depressed for these kind of feelings , as it is common to everyone. Every girl have such feeling when it comes to boys. We feel more standard and will carefully step into every step.  Even myself, I have a crush in my college. And I keenly tell you that, I have ever never talked with him, I know only his name and no other information. But whenever I see him, I feel happy inside.

    I don’t need him to talk with me or love me. I just need him to see me, and myself to see him. Don’t feel depressed for your tiny flaws and the judge mental about your character. Live the way you are, the right people can get you.

    Don’t be formal and perfect every time. No one in this world is perfect. If you change your behavior for everyone then you lose your dignity and originality. Be yourself and Be the better. So, every one can loves your originality. DON’T TAKE AND EXAMPLE BE AN EXAMPLE..

    Hope it helps you!!!

    Take Care :)

  • Ayushi Jolly
    Ayushi Jolly   Aug 29, 2017 06:59 PM

    Hey there,I hope you are doing well.

    Please know that this is a very common feeling,specially when it comes to boys or during this age. However,it can explained by-

    1.When we are thrilled by or fancied about something,we want to achieve it and to achieve it we want to appear the best version of us.Specially,during crushes we feel that he will be hard to get which automatically places him a step above us so we bring out the best of us to achieve it.

    2.The best solution to this,according me can be to keeping calm and to relax.Even if it is a crush or any boy for that matter,there is no point in chasing them.Be the way you always have been and if the other person is worth it then let him explore your real,natural self and let him fall for that only.

    Also,it is nice to know that you have stopped bothering half as much as you used to do but take to complete ignorance and see how your this little concern will also change and how you shall stop worrying and not bother about forming perceptions for other,specially opposite sex.

    Hope this helps.