Helping a friend

30 Aug
Ayushi Jolly

Hello everyone!

I know two girls who are sisters,one of them being adopted.The biological child is typically momma's child and is intelligent and hard working.Also she is in extremely good terms with her parents and is extremely obedient and seems to be the ideal child. The adopted one is little naughty and not as good as her in studies but is a much better person and likes to have fun and is modern,to say.So this biological child claims to have certain prinicples and the fact that she cannot lie to her parents and they live together so the other child has to restrict her activities according to her framework because she tells everything at home.Their parents also force them to live together which has made things worse.What can be done to help the adopted child?

Responses 3

  • Priya Parwani
    Priya Parwani   Sep 02, 2017 11:42 PM

    Hello.

    Hope you doing well. I can understand the situation. These things happen when two people possessing different characteristics are forced to live together. In this case, sisters should understand each other and support. Both the biological and the adopted one should accept each other and make some adjustments, so that both can live happily on their own terms. Parents should also understand that each child is different and unique in her own way, so they should not compare their children and allow them to live their lives the way they want.

    There should be no proper and strict code of moral conduct that needs to be followed by children, instead both of the girls should be allowed to explore their lives the way they want. So there should adjustment from parents as well as from daughters also. They should learn to accept and support each other.

  • Shubhanshi Singh
    Shubhanshi Singh   Sep 01, 2017 04:59 PM

    Hi there! 

    It would be wrong to say that the adopted one needs help. The biological one could be suffering too. It's just a matter of perspective taking. You need to look at things from the other ones perspective as well. 

    Everyone is different. We all have our own way of living and we follow our won set moral and code of living. You can't ask someone to live by your rules, we have the freedom to make our own choices and decisions. 

    These sisters need to realise that they are different. It will only require a little adjustment from both of them. Sometimes the biological one could help the adopted one in sneaking out of the house whereas sometimes the adopted one can oblige to the conduct of the biological one. 

    They are sisters. They must be taught to support each other. It will both of them in the long run. 

    They must communicate as to how both of them can live happily with each other without creating tension to people around them. Infact they should be more sisterly and care for each other's interests and well being. 

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Aug 30, 2017 08:38 PM

    Hi!!!

             Hope you are doing well. I can clearly understand about your concern.  Parents should treat their children in equality to shape them perfect. Else they have some inferiority complex, which will make the child pessimistic. So, parents should be careful while treating the children. They should never compare their children, treat them equal  and should have the equal care and affection.  Though both has their own different perspectives, they should adjust themselves to travel along. Like, if the biological child loves to be silent, obedient then the adopted child should be silent at least to be friends first. Understanding both is the first step for the strong relationship.

            Also, the adopted child should never feel herself as adopted and cornered by her sister. This will just ruin her whole life, which will make her to feel depressed, and frustrated. They should be together for better understanding. Also, their parents should have some weekend trip to make the adopted child to feel comfortable. This will make her to feel as her family and her sibling.

    Hope it helps you!!!

    Take Care :)