Should I apologise even if I don't think it's my fault?

01 Sep
Name Confidential

Recently I said something that offended my friend, I guess. It was nothing serious and I didn't have any intention to offend her. Whatever I said was in fun tone yet she is offended. I don't want to apologise to her because I don't think it's my fault. Her getting offended at small things is stupid. I have some self respect, why should I apologise for something I don't even see my fault for. She is mature she shouldn't be offended so easily at jokes. Am I right? 

Responses 4

  • Priya Parwani
    Priya Parwani   Sep 02, 2017 04:30 PM


    Hope you doing well. I can completely understand your situation. It's common to have miscommunication but we should ot take these things on to our ego. You should understand that each and every individual is different and have a different level of perception. What according to you is cool maybe is offending for her or vice-versa. So if you think that you have done nothing wrong, then go and talk to her in a good and analytical manner, make her understand your point. If she agrees then its good and if not then there is nothing wrong is apologising. Good friends are hard to find, so we should do everything to keep them by our side. This will prove her that you respect the friendship and you respect her also. So first talk and things don't go well then apologise.

    Hope this will help.

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Sep 01, 2017 07:56 PM


       Hope you are doing well. I can clearly understand about your plight situation. Not every one has the same attitude and character like you. People have some different prespectives which always differs peoples character and aatitude. May be your friend is so sensitive towwards everything else in you so she may get hurts when you say some fun words about her in front of every one. You may sit and talk about this to your friend. So, you can have the clear mind set of, what hurts her?. We people always should be so concerned with one's feelings. Every friend is important in ou life. Some may live with us for a life, some may leav the lesson for a life. 

       Also, don't be much depressed and anxious about your friends actitivity. May she already feel depressed, stressed when you spoke some fun words with her. So, she may  feel offended. You should always think about both side of a person when something bad happens. If she has no reason, but still feels like offended better you can move on. May be she feels bad about your character. If you feel guilt to apologize try to prove her about your concern. 

    Hope it helps you!!!

    Take care  :)

  • Ayushi Jolly
    Ayushi Jolly   Sep 01, 2017 05:59 PM

    Hey there,I hope you are doing well.

    Please know that friends are the forever kind of connections we develop through our interactions. It should not be affected by one minor incidence.Also,as friends it is our responsibility to make the other person feel good and make sure that little things do not weaken our bond.However,it is okay to joke around,once in a while but equally important to know that things are not interpreted in the same way by everyone.We all have different humans and have different perception to everything.Though I will not say that it is your fault but not your friend's fault entirely either.Some people are sensitive to one particular thing and others to something else so it should not really matter. Also,please do not let your bond get affected by something so fickle. 

    To improve things,please do not hesitate in taking the first step because it was somewhere your fault,if not majorly then a little.Though I agree that you intended it as a casual joke and she got offended by it,which she should not had but this is how friendships continue,when we apologise because the person means more than our ego and it is okay to say sorry,nothing is wrong if we have to put ourself down for someone who means so much to me.

  • Name Confidential
    Anonymous   Sep 01, 2017 05:49 PM

    Hey, this misinterpreting of words is very common in friendship. There is always that one person in the group who gets offended often and very easily. He or she gets hurt even if one doesn't mean anything bad to him or her. In your case, I would suggest that talk to your friend and tell her that that she misunderstood your words. You meant something else and you didn't say it to hurt her. Those words weren't for her. Ask her what exacltly did hurt her. It can be that your tone of talking was rough which had hurt her. If this is the reason or any other thing which you agree to after talkinv to her, do apologise to her. Even if it is not your fault, apologise her once. What is the harm ? It will remove the harshness in friendship. Don't let ego enter in friendhsip. If she often gets hurt for no reason. Tell her to try to mimise this behaviour of hers. Not everything is meant to criticse her. Ask her to think over herself. Don't let this small issue affect friendship. Talk to her and sort out the difference. Both will have to take efforts from their side. 

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