Should I choose acting or good marks?

14 Jul
Name Confidential

I have a passion for acting, but pursuing it has been taking a lot of my time. I've been losing time for studying and despite that, scoring just fine. Slightly average. While i'm fine with this, it makes my father very angry. He wants me to be a student who scores above average, rather, he wants me to be a topper, and pursue IAS. Acting makes me really happy, but he says I should focus on my studies. I feel unable to communicate to him how he should let me do the things I want. What to do?

Responses 8

  • Aishwarya K
    Aishwarya K   Aug 07, 2017 02:06 AM

    Hey, I can understand your situation. We all know that our parents only want the best for us. Most of the decisions that we take they are often under the guidance of our parents. Our parents’ approval and support matter a lot to us. So it is normal for you to want to try and align your goals and plans with their expectations and their plans.

    You mentioned that they are not forcing you, but somewhere you still feel compelled to do what they are asking you to do. You also said that you want to make your parents happy. In this case, you need to understand that your parents will be happy when you are happy. Perhaps they believe that pursuing IAS will secure your future and make you happy. If that is not how you feel, then you should talk to them about it. Patiently try to explain it to your parents that you are more focused towards your college courses and that you have other plans.

    You need to openly talk to them that you really want to pursue acting. Tell them what you are passionate about and how preparing for IAS is not something that you want to do at all. They will be able to understand you better this way.

  • Shreya Narayanan
    Shreya Narayanan   Jul 30, 2017 04:24 PM

    If you're good at something,never do it for free.

    Act. Isn't it obvious? I know it'll be hard to convince him,given his dreams for you being an IAS officer and right now,being a topper.

    I am definitely not blaming your dad for your dilemma,neither you. It's all the mindset which needs to change. You know, our parents have struggled a lot in bringing us up and to return this favour,they want us to work in a noble field. Being an IAS is nobler than many professions. It is sad but this exchange of favours exist in many households which makes me sad. 

    Have you seen tangled? In there, Rapunzel's mother sings this weird song of how mother knows the best. It's true,she does know the best. But what use is it of when you are not letting your own child to explore the good and the bad side of life. It's like telling your child about this dangerous realm called life but restricting  him/her to even experience even a morsel of it. I know they don't want to get you hurt or sad,but then what's life without a little risk?

    Convince them properly,if you're good at it and want to change your stream,tell it directly. Tell everything you want to do regarding your new career option, convincing them soothingly. I know, becoming an IAS officer wouldn't give you as much pleasure as acting would and that they need to understand and you have to make them understand.


    By no means,get suicidal because it is stupid.

    May the force be with you. Have a good day and hope you live your dream one day.

  • Sukanya Mitra
    Sukanya Mitra   Jul 27, 2017 04:27 PM


    I understand what are you going through.

    in our society what are you facing is very common. see what you need to do this express this to your parents. gather courage and speak to them. you may have tried this and your parents have denied that. but continue to try. don't give up.

    tell them why do you want to pursue acting. tell them the advantages. they may say about all the struggles and cons of the career but you stick to the positive points. you have to somehow convince them. but first you have to believe in yourself, believe in your dream and you have to make your parent believe in that you can do. I know it's a tough task but you can do that :)

    one more thing you can add is that tell them you would be unhappy if you pursue what they are telling to do. after all its children happiness that matters to parents more than anything.

    see communication is the key. communicate to your father in a very polite way. keep your points ready. tell them to him. say him to think about everything. see he will surely listen :)

    hope this answer helps you. glad you shared with us. :)

    take care...

  • Tanvi Kalra
    Tanvi Kalra   Jul 22, 2017 12:27 PM

    Hey! Following your passion is the best thing you can do to yourself in life. The parents obviously want the best for you. They just need the assurance that you wouldn't regret the decision you make for yourself. The first thing to do is convincing your father that your acting skills and perseverance will lead to something great in future. For this he needs to see your efforts and what you get I'm return. This creative field has a lot of competition. I don't know whether you are part of theatre or not. If not then start working with theatre people first at small scale. There is a huge difference between what we want and where are efforts are leading us. If you seriously want to pursue acting as a career then do sethimg serious and balance it with studies. Good luck!

  • Radhika Goel
    Radhika Goel   Jul 20, 2017 11:13 AM

    Hey, hope you are doing well :)

    You must re-evaluate how much acting means to you. Do you want to take it up as a career no matter what the costs? If yes, for you to be able to make your father understand your passion for acting you have to make an effort to understand why he wants you to pursue IAS. You have to first understand his predicament and then find a way to reason with him.

    I want to narrate my best freind's story.

    She has always had a passion for theatre and could not find an outlet for it all her life because her parents wanted her to concentrate on studying. Today, she is at an engineering college as per her parents wishes but also the head of the theatre department and putting up plays that leave the audience spell bound. To be able to pursue theatre she wakes up two hours earlier to complete her studies.

    There are two things that one can pick up from here :

    1. Wait for the right time 
    2. Sacrifice leisure time for passion

    What I want to say through this is, you can continue to study what your father wants you to and build yourself as an actor to eventually show you father that you are good at it and can be succesful in the field!

    APOORVA PANDEY   Jul 15, 2017 03:43 PM


    First understand why your father wants you to pursue a particular career and then you may be able to figure out how to deal with this situation:

    • First understand that it is not the particular career IAS that your parents actually wish for you. Parents want anything for their children that guarantees them certain stability in life and a feeling that their children are well settled. Keeping this in mind, talk to your parents on how the career that you have in your mind will help you attain what you want in your life and in turn keep you happy. 
    • Explain them how much better is to put effort in something you know you have an aptitude for and something that makes you feel happy rather than in something that would never enable you meet your life goals.
    • It is in these situations that the value of movies come to fore in our lives. Just relate and think about it, what else was the movie 3 idiots about!




  • Ayushi Jolly
    Ayushi Jolly   Jul 15, 2017 12:33 PM

    Hey there!

    Estimating to be of your age range, I know that being fickle minded is a part of growing. Everybody in this age has a lot of ideas and plans,not able to set priorities right,also worrying that things might go wrong and the like. However,it can all be sorted as easily as the worry arrives. What really matters is what you want to do. If you want to do soemthing,you will be able to do it and give your best,otherwise excuses are always there.

    Coming to your case,what really matters is that you able to multi-task but are not able to give your 100% anywhere. See,I would like to suggest that focus on your studies first. Acting is a career that can be considered even later in life. It is something that does not guarantee success.It is a risky profession and specially with the increasing competition and inavailability of sources or contact.

    Parents do not sound right and seem to be interfering but they are always right. I agree that you should focus on your studies first. If your dad has a plan and you think you are capable,you shoudl try that first. You can always get into an acting school or try directly to the industry at anytime in life but it is advisable to have something to fall back on.

    Hope this helps!

  • Shanmugi B.P
    Shanmugi B.P   Jul 14, 2017 10:16 PM


        Parents are the real caretakers and protectors in our life. So your father may think that acting is not safe and good for your life. I can hereby suggest you something to resolve this,

    1.First of all, If your passion is acting and your parents are really not interested and makes you not to do it. The only solution is you can talk with your father about your passion and dream. You should give him the assurance about achieving your goal without any big problems.

    2.Make your father to think positive about the field you have been chosen. As being a father he might feels something wrong and rejects your passion.

    3.If your father fails to understand about your passion and concern. Then you should think once, twice and thrice and more than that, “Are they the valid reasons for his rejection?, If I choose this field am I fit to travel to the end of this goal?, Am I ready not to drop down my dream at any situation?”. So you should think in all ways and should take a perfect decision as this is your life.

    Life is only once live with determination and satisfaction.

    Hope, it helps you  !!!

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